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If your marriage has drifted into resentment and
dried
emotions, apply the following to get on track.
Marriages dissolve over time.
As little
disappointments grow to resentments that fester and produce the nasty blame game
the relationship breaks apart.
Change demands action; only doing will transform
your feelings and repair your marriage foundation. If your
partner is unwilling to get help, commit to
the following plan to change the atmosphere.
Words
First, use
positive language and
compliment: "You look nice, I like
your shirt, thanks for doing the dishes, you are pretty," etc. It may be tough,
but do it. Avoid blaming,
criticizing, judging, or being offensive. If
you say something harsh, ask forgiveness and then
say three positive things over the rest of the day.
When making a request use please and thank you along
with a kind voice. And remember, encouragement
releases tremendous power.
Face to Face
After a few days arrange to spend time together two times a week; talking at the
kitchen table is fine. Mention topics of
interest to your spouse: work, hobby, or friends.
Eventually plan a walk, go for coffee, enjoy a special lunch
together, go site seeing or window-shopping. Spend
at least half to one hour together.
Touch Gently touch him/her in comforting ways: hold
hands, walk arm in arm, give a short shoulder rub,
plant a small kiss, or nestle on the
couch. Little signals that
say, “I accept and love you,” rebuild intimacy.
Get Physical
If sex is broken, build up to an intimate time
free of expectations. Begin with holding each
other, the key is to remove the stress and demands.
Little by Little Your goal is to rebuild your
relationship step by step. Most couples drift and hide; you can reverse the drift. Take
action now by applying the above and watch your
marriage drift together. For more coaching click
here.
Also, check this article
from Divorce Busters:
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